Almost there!

OK so I made it past Christmas. It was hard, but i did it. Here I am with my grandpa and daddy. I've had this whole week off and it has felt like one long weekend. We still haven't gone sledding, because every time we make plans we wake up and it looks like a storm is coming in. So New Years Day is our next attempt. Ice skating didn't happen either, but that would be the fault of the girls. I've told them to get a reward they have to be good and stop fighting. Well I guess they just can't help themselves. Hopefully on an upcoming weekend. I have figured out though that I love working. I mean I always knew I loved my job, but I need it to keep sane. OK so one more day until we all get to start a new year. It's a time to rethink your life, what you've been through, want to change or keep the same. I've been doing a lot of soul searching since grandma passed. She has even come to me in my dreams (which is huge for me because I never dream or remember them.) So it means a lot that I figure out exactly what is working for me and what is not.

1. of course there is always the same thing on top of every one's list. Lose Weight. I want to go to my yoga class every single Tuesday. I know I can do it too, because I did it through the hole summer. Start doing my crunches again. I use to teach them when I worked at Curves so I have no excuse for that one. Also to continue working on what I eat. I have cut beef out of my diet, no soda. Now I need to cut chocolate out completely and continue to eat my tuna sandwiches.

2. I need do to more for me. I don't mean buying things either. I have every other weekend without my girls and I need to go out and do things. Meet new people, have some fun, try new things.

3. Re evaluate the relationships in my life. Define why I have someone in my life and if its healthy to keep them there. To move on from the "relationship" I've been in for the past year. It's not going anywhere, no matter how much I like him. I really do want to be friends with him, we are great together and are both good people, but the timing is not right for him and I can't keep my heart out there anymore. It's been hurt so many times especially the past 3 years. I don't want to rebuild the brick wall either.

4. Determine what I need to do to better the lives of my 3 beautiful and fun spirited girls. They don't have a bad life by any means, but how can I make things easier for them. Like Caitlyn and all her learning problems. I want them to feel like they can do anything and no matter what mom will always be there to back them up or help them get through it. I need to start this before the become back talking teenagers.

5. Spend as much time with my family as I can. We are only on Earth for a short while and we need to make sure that we tell everyone that we love them and also show them. Words are easy to say and can be faked, but to show someone is to truly feel it. It will let them know that you actually mean it. They will always remember that you drove that extra 45 mins to go see them or stopped by just because. My family is the most important thing in my life and I want to love them and be loved by them as much as possible.

6. I think my final thing is to try and stay healthy. I have a Dr's appointment tomorrow for possible high blood pressure. In my opinion 30 in too young to have to go through that. I need to figure out what I need to do to keep my life health and calm. I would like to get off most of the meds I'm on and just be healthy.