Almost there!

OK so I made it past Christmas. It was hard, but i did it. Here I am with my grandpa and daddy. I've had this whole week off and it has felt like one long weekend. We still haven't gone sledding, because every time we make plans we wake up and it looks like a storm is coming in. So New Years Day is our next attempt. Ice skating didn't happen either, but that would be the fault of the girls. I've told them to get a reward they have to be good and stop fighting. Well I guess they just can't help themselves. Hopefully on an upcoming weekend. I have figured out though that I love working. I mean I always knew I loved my job, but I need it to keep sane. OK so one more day until we all get to start a new year. It's a time to rethink your life, what you've been through, want to change or keep the same. I've been doing a lot of soul searching since grandma passed. She has even come to me in my dreams (which is huge for me because I never dream or remember them.) So it means a lot that I figure out exactly what is working for me and what is not.

1. of course there is always the same thing on top of every one's list. Lose Weight. I want to go to my yoga class every single Tuesday. I know I can do it too, because I did it through the hole summer. Start doing my crunches again. I use to teach them when I worked at Curves so I have no excuse for that one. Also to continue working on what I eat. I have cut beef out of my diet, no soda. Now I need to cut chocolate out completely and continue to eat my tuna sandwiches.

2. I need do to more for me. I don't mean buying things either. I have every other weekend without my girls and I need to go out and do things. Meet new people, have some fun, try new things.

3. Re evaluate the relationships in my life. Define why I have someone in my life and if its healthy to keep them there. To move on from the "relationship" I've been in for the past year. It's not going anywhere, no matter how much I like him. I really do want to be friends with him, we are great together and are both good people, but the timing is not right for him and I can't keep my heart out there anymore. It's been hurt so many times especially the past 3 years. I don't want to rebuild the brick wall either.

4. Determine what I need to do to better the lives of my 3 beautiful and fun spirited girls. They don't have a bad life by any means, but how can I make things easier for them. Like Caitlyn and all her learning problems. I want them to feel like they can do anything and no matter what mom will always be there to back them up or help them get through it. I need to start this before the become back talking teenagers.

5. Spend as much time with my family as I can. We are only on Earth for a short while and we need to make sure that we tell everyone that we love them and also show them. Words are easy to say and can be faked, but to show someone is to truly feel it. It will let them know that you actually mean it. They will always remember that you drove that extra 45 mins to go see them or stopped by just because. My family is the most important thing in my life and I want to love them and be loved by them as much as possible.

6. I think my final thing is to try and stay healthy. I have a Dr's appointment tomorrow for possible high blood pressure. In my opinion 30 in too young to have to go through that. I need to figure out what I need to do to keep my life health and calm. I would like to get off most of the meds I'm on and just be healthy.

Ok so today is a good and bad day. It didn't snow over night, but It snowed this morning. It was sticking and I was getting so excited. This is our mountains at around 11:30. Well about 30 minutes ago the sun came out and now we have blue skies. What's up with that. I don't like being teased. lol Here is the pity me part. The closer we get to Christmas the harder it's getting for me. I do think I'm dealing with it pretty good, but maybe I haven't let it sink in. I don't know. I took some poinsettia's to her grave so that she could have some Christmas. I still can't talk to her. My oldest, Celeste, still hasn't gone out to visit her. She said she's not ready. I wonder if her taking her time is better than me trying to rush to get over it. On Monday I'm going over to my dad's for our Christmas together. It's going to be so hard to see grandpa there without her. I'm going to miss sitting in the kitchen and chatting with her and Liz. The cute little things she use to give me. She always went to Costco or Target and got the cutest things that held cookies or candy. I always use them as decorations the years after. I guess I keep wondering how long it's going to hurt this bad. I'm sure it'll be a long time though. Thanks for listening (or reading) to me vent.

Santa Train

On Saturday, Caitlyn, Makayla and I met Angie and Chloe in Carson to ride the Santa Train. It was freezing cold outside, but the girls were thrilled. When we were on the train Santa came through and gave everyone a candy cane. Friday night Caitlyn had her recital. She did perfect. I am so proud of her. She didn't make one mistake. On the way there she kept telling me how nervous she was. I can't believe they are growing up. I got all my shopping done and just about everything wrapped. Friday is my work gift exchange and Celeste's party at school. I'm going to go on my lunch break. Christmas eve my mom is coming over and then the girls and I are going to my dad's for dinner. While I'm off work, Rob's mom is coming to stay with us over night. We are also going sledding with Chloe and Angie the day after Christmas and ice skating that same week. I've got to keep myself busy this holiday if I want to make it through in one piece. I can't believe it's almost a new year. Time to make some changes. I'm hoping for a happy year. God knows I need one. Well I'm also hoping for some more snow. We are suppose to get lots tonight, but I've heard that before. Well I guess I'll find out in about 9 hours.

O Christmas Tree

I finally got a new tree. Target was having a 30% off sale. This was the nicest one that was under $200. I like colored lights on my tree, but thought why not. Now that it's up and decorated it looks so pretty. I am very happy with it. I let the girls do all the decorating this year. I only helped by putting some of the ornaments up higher. I think they were glad that I left it to them. I can't believe how fast this month is going. Today I want to say HAPPY BIRTHDAY MY SWEET CHLOE! My little niece is now 4 years old. Talk about time flying. I get to see her on Saturday. There is a train in Carson that is going to give the kids rides and have Santa there, so we will probably meet her there. Today Angie took off of work and they went to Chuck E Cheese and build a bear. Tomorrow is Caitlyn's recital. I am so excited. I will definitely be posting a picture. Cross your fingers for her.

Winter Wonderland

Wow I sure got what I wanted. It snowed all day Friday through Saturday evening. It's funny how things work out. I wanted snow and got it, but because of the snow George couldn't come hang out. Be careful what you wish for huh. lol When I was driving through town on Saturday I noticed that one of the local businesses had someone in their front area making something out of snow. Today I went and took a picture of it. He built it in the shadow and it's been so darn cold it isn't going to be melting for awhile. Today's high is suppose to be 32. I know that we are warm compared to some places, but just a week ago it was in the 70's. It's such a drastic change. On this Friday Caitlyn has her first piano recital. I'm so excited. This last weekend I went Christmas shopping. I'm 95% done. I got my Christmas bonus, so that helps a lot. On Christmas eve my mom is going to come over and then that evening my girls and I are going to my dads. Thursday my niece, Chloe turns 4! I can't believe how big she is getting. I might get to see her tomorrow. Angie called and asked and I told her no way I don't want to see her. And Angie said she was going to tell Chloe that her Auntie doesn't like her anymore. hehe I told her that Chloe won't believe her. In 2 weeks it'll be Christmas and I'll be on my vacation. We aren't going anywhere. I'm going to take the girls sledding and ice skating and we are going to just hang out. Some much needed mother/daughters time with fun and no fighting. As the holiday gets closer I keep thinking about grandma. It's so weird to me to think that she won't be at the get together. It's like sometimes I think she's still here. I bought some poinsettias to put at the grave. She loved Christmas so I thought it would be nice to bring her a little of the holiday. My aunt and her girlfriend are coming for Christmas to help keep grandpas mind occupied. He told me that he was glad, because it will help. He's keeping busy, but he said he has his good and bad days. Just like anyone else I suppose. I'm very proud of him. He's doing much better than we all thought he would. I guess I should have known better. He's a retired military man with a lot of faith in God.

Let it snow, Let it snow!

Well it looks like I got my wish! It snowed last night. Not as much as I wanted, but I'll take it. It looks so pretty out. Now it just needs to keep doing it. So today Rob is getting his new iphone. I can't wait to play with it. So this picture was taken in March of 2006. It is a real snowflake from 1979. It was preserved with superglue. I found this article on how to do it. So of course the snow goddess that I am, I'm going to have to try it. Let me know if you want a link to try it also.

I'm wishing for a white winter!

No this is not a picture of Gardnerville, just what I want it to look like. I can't believe that it's December 4th and it still is dry as a bone. They said on the radio this morning that this is the driest winter since 1947. It's finally cloudy today, but still nothing. We are even praying for rain. Not being too picky. I'm hoping that we at least get some before Christmas. I took the week of Christmas off of work. I always take time off during the summer and we go to the beach and do summer stuff. I thought that it would be nice if did some winter fun together. If we go sledding in the dirt we'll just hit a bunch of rocks. lol I know I'm complaining, but oh well. So anyways Caitlyn has her first piano recital on December 14th. I'm excited. Things are finally starting to calm down. I started my Christmas cards yesterday and now have to decorated the house.

Christmas Survey

Welcome to the Christmas edition of getting to know your friends. Okay, here's what you're supposed to do: Just copy this entire blog entry and paste it into a new post on your blog. Change all the answers so that they apply to you. Here we go...

1. Wrapping paper or gift bags? Both. It depends on the gift.
2. Real tree or artificial? I like real, but they are expensive and the girls have asthma.
3. When do you put up the tree? The first or second weekend in December
4. When do you take the tree down? Day after Christmas. Can't wait to get me house back to normal.
5. Do you like eggnog? No way
6. Favorite gift received as a child? My barbie house. I was about 5. it was 2 story and 3 pieces (huge)
7. Do you have a nativity scene? yes
8. Hardest person to buy for? I think my mom is.
10. Worst Christmas gift you ever received? not sure
11. Mail or email Christmas cards? I do both, but mostly mail.
12. Favorite Christmas Movie? A Christmas Story
13. When do you start shopping for Christmas? In the summer. I have too many kids to buy for.
14. Have you ever recycled a Christmas present? I don't think so
15. Favorite thing to eat at Christmas? Sugar cookies
16. Clear lights or colored on the tree? Colored on the tree and clear outside
17. Favorite Christmas song? Winter Wonderland
18. Travel at Christmas or stay home? Stay home! Santa has to come. hehe
19. Can you name all of Santa's reindeer? Yes i can: dasher, dancer, prancer, vixen, comet, cupid, donder and blitzen. and rudolph
20. Angel on the tree top or a star? A star. its what they followed on christmas night
21. Open the presents Christmas Eve or morning? Christmas morning, but my dad's house on Christmas eve.
22. Most annoying thing about this time of year? the people. Everyone is grumpy and pushy.
23. What I love most about Christmas? The look on the girls faces on Christmas morning when they see everything under the tree.

It's quiet....

Well my friends went home yesterday. I went home and it was so quiet. I almost didn't know what to do with myself. lol. It was fun to have something to do every night, but I was sure glad to get some sleep. So back to normal for now. Rob has been moving this week. He's moving into a house and now the girls will actually have a room when they stay with him. He is very excited. It's so cute, Caitlyn said that the house "rocks". I can't believe that tomorrow is the first day of December. Time goes so fast. On the 13th my neice will be 4. I still remember taking my sister to the hospital to have her. It's so funny, but a lot of the houses around here have had their Christmas lights up since Thanksgiving. I think Christmas starts earlier every year. We all have dog fever at my work right now. Jackie got her new Bassett earlier this year, then they helped me decided to get my little Toby. Well know Genny is looking at a little puppy and Linda is looking to adopt a bassett. Cassie's dog had puppies not too long ago so we are surrounded by dogs.

Another sunny day.

So here is the picture that I submitted for my works photo contest. We were bummed that all the leaves had come off the trees. I was trying to wait until there was some snow, but it's been pretty dry here. I'm really hoping that December brings some snow, because my sister and I have plans to take the girls sledding. At this rate we may not get to go til next year! So I went to see The Mist on Sunday. It was a good movie. Of course Stephen King is my favorite, but they don't always make his books into good movies. I did go shopping this weekend, but it was on Saturday and not in the morning. I went to Michaels to find the Cricut that was on sale for $129. instead of $300, but she said they sold out within 15 mins of opening on Friday morning. Of course I was working. The lady was nice, I think she felt sorry for me, she gave me a 50% off coupon so I bought the daisyrunner. I haven't gotten to really play with it yet, because after shopping I went to my dad's for the tree trimming party. I helped Liz with the food. The girls totally attacked the tree and had it done in no time. It was nice. Grandpa seemed better than on Thanksgiving. Dad's buddy and his girlfriend were there too. We all hung out and talked until around 10:30. It's funny because normally dad and Liz go to bed at 9:00. Caitlyn got to stay the night. On Monday my girlfriend Jenn came into town. I haven't seen her in like 2 years. She lives in Coarsegold, Ca. She brought Brooklyn(her daughter and Celeste's best friend), her friend Mandy and Mandy's 2 girls. Jenn and I have been friends for 10 years. They are all staying at my house. This is the first time that I've met Mandy, but I like her. She's very nice. I can't believe that I have 6 kids at my house. The amazing thing is that last night none of them fought. It was like a wonderful miracle. They were suppose to leave today, but are going to stay another night. We are going to see Enchanted tonight. We've had parent/teacher conferences this week. Caitlyn is improving. She needs help still, but at least there's an improvement. Makayla got all B's and one C. Mrs. Class (her math teacher) said she's the star of the math class. Her teacher Mrs. Diaz said shes a great student. I will see Celestes tonight. I'm sure it's all good news. She's a great student. Makayla tried out for a part in the school play yesterday. SHE GOT IT!!!! She's going to be a munchkin in The Wizard of Oz. I'm so excited. The play is in March so she has plenty of time to prepare. Well it is time to get some work done!

Well it's the day after Thanksgiving. We survived our first holiday without grandma. It was so hard. Her and I always stand in the kitchen and talk. While we were eating dinner I kept looking at grandpa and he looked so sad. It was so heartbreaking. I don't know how he's going to make it through Christmas. Anyways, when I came into work today we put the radio on and they are already playing Christmas music. AHHHH It's to early. I can't believe it. Well today starts the busy shopping season. I'm so glad that I'm almost done. And thank God for internet shopping. Tomorrow I have to go grocery shopping and I'm so not looking forward to it. Going to Walmart between now and January is suicide. My sister actually went out there today. I don't know if she found any good deals or not. Well it is very slow at work today so we get to catch up on our sleep. hehe. Tomorrow I get to go to my dad's again. We are going to their tree trimming party. It's Liz's way of not decorating the tree. She just lets the girls do it. I was bummed to find out that George has to work all weekend so he won't be coming to visit. Well hopefully next weekend. I really wish he hadn't moved, but I know that people have to go where the jobs and money are. Well it's starting to get real cold here. Today we could see the ski resorts making snow. All of the sudden there was a big stripe of snow! It would be nice to get some snow. We live in an area that use to be known for it's skiing and now we have very mellow winters. Don't get me wrong it's very cold, but when it snows it warms up. Well on to do some work!

I'm thankful for....

* my girls. They make my laugh and feel loved.
* my family. They are always there for me.
* my friends. They are fun and I always have someone to talk to. (my mb friends and ones that live far from me.)
* my job. It's a great job that I enjoy. I love my co workers. And also because of it I can support my family.
* my health.
* that I am able to visit grandma whenever I want. I only live about 10 mins from her grave.
* that I have the talent to sew, scrap and bake. I know it's silly, but not everyone can do it.
* my puppy. He is so sweet and loving. He makes me feel very important.
* I get to spend Thanksgiving with my grandpa. I worry about him every day.
* I met a nice guy. Even if he lives 2 1/2 hours away he still makes me feel special. (I do wish he hadn't moved, but he did)
***I'm sure there is more, but right now that's what I can think of. What are you thankful for?

Time to move forward

First of all I want to thank everyone for all their wishes, prayers, and kind words. The funeral was very nice. Grandma did plan out the scriptures and songs. I think she would be very happy. 2 of my cousins, Uncle Harry and I all got up and said something. It was very hard, but I felt that I needed to say my goodbyes and let everyone know how much she meant to me. They did end up having an open casket, but not for me. I would rather remember all the good times and that the last time I saw her she told me she would be seeing me a lot and that she loves me. My sweet Makayla wrote her a letter and drew her a picture then put it in the casket with her. I am so proud of her for that. It was a long hard day, but we made it through. Grandpa is doing as well as one can expect. My aunts went home today so he is finally alone. We are going to have Thanksgiving with him so he doesn't have to be lonely. I went to go visit her yesterday, but it was too soon. I couldn't talk to her yet. I did tell the girls that any time they want to see her we would go. As for Thanksgiving, I was suppose to be at Disneyland, but with all of this and some other things it is just not a good time. I am so bummed. I was looking forward to going. The girls kind of blew it though. I used Disneyland as a bribe (you might say) that if they were bad we would cancel the trip. Well I guess the twins just couldn't help themselves. I feel bad for Celeste because she gets to miss out on things because the twins just can't behave. I think we are going to try and go to the San Francisco Zoo at the beginning of next year to make up for missing Disneyland. It won't be the same, but the girls love animals and Celeste wants to be a zoologist. There is also a science museum there so that could be fun too. Well I guess I should get back to work.

She has moved on

Well sad news, Grandma passed away on Tuesday night. I'm pretty sure she went to sleep and that was it. My dad called me first thing Wednesday morning. Yesterday I spent the day with my dad, sister, grandpa, and 2 aunts. I was glad that I got to spend time with them before the rest of the family comes. I love my family, but there are a lot of us and it was easier to visit. Tomorrow is the funeral and everyone is coming in tonight. I'm glad that she finally let go. I know that my dad told her on Tuesday that it was ok, because we would take care of grandpa. It's hard to lose her, but I know that she wants all of us to go on with our lives. She wants all of us to be happy. She is looking down from heaven and watching over all of us. I am going to miss her so much!

MY HERO

My hero is a woman who has lived a very full life. Someone who didn't marry until she was 35 years old, but found her sole mate. She raised 3 kids and let me tell you her son was a terror. :) She is a military wife who moved all over and had to take care of her children alone when her husband was out to sea. Her parents died when she was young so had to grow up faster than normal. Has the strongest faith in God I have ever seen. I do believe it is because of that that she has made it through everything. She has eight grand children and 8 great grandchildren. She has so much love in her life. She has always believed in me. Complements me on things I do, such as decorating my home, making birthday cakes, the costumes I sew, and raising my own children. To have a woman like her tell me that I am a good mom is the best complement I could ever receive. Being married to the same man for 56 years is such an accomplishment to me. And still be madly in love after 56 years. I love the fact that she married a man 11 years younger and back in those days that was unusual. My whole life she has made me feel so special. The fact that I am going to lose her is very sad and hard on me, but to know that she believes that where she is going makes her happy. I'm also glad that my girls got to know her so well. Not many people get to know their great grandparents. I just hope she knows how much I love her and what she means to me. Great people like her don't come around very often. When she goes we are going to lose a great person.

Random thoughts...

*Why is it that as moms we insist on buying our kids too much for Christmas? Every year I sit down to make sure that I have an even amount for the girls and I swear the piles get bigger and bigger.

*This year I have learned that I can make it on my own. As long as I have my girls, I have the strength and love to make it through.

*I also learned that I can fall again. I met a great guy, who makes me happy when we are together. It's just too bad that we can't be a couple. I'm just happy that he comes to visit after he moved. Maybe in the future we will both be ready, but as long as we are still in each others lives I'm happy.

*I found out that you can still be close with you ex-husband. We do still fight like we are still married sometimes, but when it comes down to it we are great friends.

*I have realized that no matter what you are going through your family will always be there for you. They may annoy you, but they back you up and help you out no questions asked.

*It's important to like where you work. You spend most of your awake time at your job, you should enjoy your job and fellow employees. I love my job!

*Cell phones. It's funny, I love my phone. Always texting someone, but boy does it make me mad when customers come into the bank talking on the phone and can't get off long enough to tell you what they want done with their money. Maybe I should accidentally deposit it into my own account. hehe

Well I guess that's enough rambling for now.

Nothing much here!

Well here's to another day. I took Toby to get his shots on Saturday and the poor thing hasn't been feeling good. Last night was the first night I didn't have to get up in the middle of the night to clean him up. It's funny, my twins are 8 and I thought I was done with the baby stuff. hehe. Rob had to fly out on Sunday to Vegas for the week, so I had the girls this weekend. It's not his fault he had to for work, but boy do I feel like I have the girls all the time lately. God knows I love them, but I also enjoy my little breaks I get. It gives me time to get my nails done or go grocery shopping without all the "help". But it actually worked out because this up coming weekend is a 3 day weekend. I'm having a Body Shop party on the 13th so I have an extra day to clean up. Well grandma is still fighting. My dad said that she is drinking Gatorade now. Which is what I kept telling them to give her. She goes through stages where she won't drink anything and I figure this way she gets something good in her when she does. My bank is having a photo contest. They are fixing up our website and on the locations link they are going to put a picture of each branch. Well each branch gets to submit as many pictures as they want and the winner of each branch gets a $25 gift card. The cool part is that the girls I work with call me the photographer so I don't have any competition. It will also be cool that the picture on the website will be one that I took.

I'm ready for my close up!

I thought I'd share some close ups so you can see their faces!

Trick or Treat!

So here are the costumes! The best part of Halloween for me is putting the girls in their costumes and doing their hair and make-up. I think this year the costumes turned out really good with the colors and personalities of the girls. Celeste looks like she is from Norway! I can't believe how well the belly dancer outfit suited Makayla. And Caitlyn's was the most fun for me only because I really got to play with her hair and makeup. Last night we went to the safe street that our town has for the kids. It's such a great thing they do for the community. Different businesses volunteer to have a spot and hand out "safe" candy to the kids. It only costs $2 per kid, which goes toward next year. Each kid also gets a raffle ticket to possibly win a big prize. Well when we were done I told my girlfriend that for 5 years we've never won and right as I said that we found out we had a winning ticket! Can you believe it. The girls won a brand new bike. I was so excited for them. Can you just imagine going tick or treating and getting a bike. What a great treat. Now to just figure out how 1 bike and 3 girls evens out. They already have bikes, but now that there's a new one they are all going to want it. I was teasing them last night telling them that this is there Christmas present and it's all they are getting. Of course they didn't believe me.

One more day!

Well tomorrow is Halloween. It's almost like Christmas in my house. Of course we already had our party, but there is still trick or treating. The girls are very excited, but I think I'm going to have to hide the candy so I can get some peace. On Sunday I went to go see my grandma. She is so thin and can't get out of bed. My two aunts were visiting so it was nice to see family. I'm having a hard time thinking about how my poor grandpa is doing. He also is losing weight. He's so busy taking care of her that i don't think he's taking care of himself. It's not easy to watch my grandparents losing their sole mates. My poor dad too. He's holding up good on the outside, but I know him way to well. The hospice people came yesterday and brought her a hospital bed. The lady said that its goes pretty quick from here. Which is OK, because she doesn't need to suffer anymore and neither does the rest of the family. OK enough sadness. Well hopefully I'll get the pictures of the girls from the party up soon.

Nevada Day

Well today is Nevada Day. State employees are off and schools are closed. My bank is based out of Ca so guess where I am right now. The good news is that we got to wear western clothing in stead of our uniforms. Also today my girlfriend Tiffany came by my work with her daughter Payton. Payton is now 9 months old and just started taking her first steps. I got to see her take about 6 or 7. It's so exciting to watch them grow up. Speaking of babies one of my other girlfriends, Raeley called me today and told me she is pregnant. I'm so excited. She thinks she is about 1 1/2 months. I can't believe we are going to have another baby!!! I say we because we have this group of us that have been friends for about 11 years or so. We have our own Ya-Ya sisterhood. So Congratulations to Maiden Garden Jewel! Tomorrow is our Annual Halloween Party. This will be the 4th year. I'm excited as always. The girls have their homemade costumes. (Thanks to the best mom is the world. hehe) Caitlyn is going to be a mermaid, Makayla a belly dancer. I actually didn't make one for Celeste this year. She wanted to wear an authentic Norwegian Traditional Dress. So I ordered one from Norway. We even kept the packaging because it came from Norway. She picked that because we are Norwegian and because of her great-grandma. Grandma is sick and will not be here much longer so it is to honor her. I can't wait until grandma sees her. Well tonight I get to go to the grocery store and buy food to make all kinds of Halloween themed foods. So hopefully we have a good turn out. Speaking of dressing up what would be your most favorite thing to dress up as?

First blog

Well this is my first Blog. So here it goes. I thought I could keep everyone updated on my busy life and my girls. We just finished soccer season. Makayla's 4th season. She decided to play spring this next year. Caitlyn just started her piano lessons. She seems to like it. Celeste decided that flute was not for her and quit band, but she is loving her cheer class. The girls are keeping very busy. We just got progress reports and Celeste got A's and B's, the twins got A's, B's, and C's. About a month and a half ago I finally got myself a puppy. He's a mini dachshund. His name is Toby. He's very loving and already potty trained. He will be 4 months old on November 1st. It's funny because I have never considered myself an animal person. I always wondered how someone could love their dog so much. Well now I think I understand. But I do still have my fish. Well I'm sure that's enough for today.